Child Brides: Legal Marriage, Illegal Age?

Child Brides: Legal Marriage, Illegal Age?

Published on Thursday, 01 January 2015 06:46

Written by Arief Irsyad

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un.orgStudying and worrying about exams and school grades, gossiping with friends about love interests past midnight especially on weekends, hanging out in shopping malls browsing for the latest fashion, blasting loud music in the room, singing in front of the mirror while no one is watching, catching the latest movies with buddies − these are among the common activities in the ideal life of a child.

For some however, their childhood has been compromised, as they are forced to grow up too quickly, a result of being married at an early age. A curse, or a blessing, the bigger question is, do children know what they are getting themselves into?

All For Love?

Love. Everyone wants to be surrounded by this feeling and make sense of that very word as they perceive it to be. While the ideal approach to embrace love is through marriage, would a child at the age of 16 require the feeling of ‘love’ when they cannot really make sense of most things around the world, and have yet to grasp the different characters they meet, what more their intentions?Photo:www.fanpop.com

Logically, children know nothing of love other than it being a mere feeling. Obviously, at 16, they are still deemed illegal to go behind the wheels, what more watch 18+ rated movies. But surprisingly, law has it that they can get married legally in this country.

A young female adult unwraps her sentiment towards young love and marriage.Masshiela Ahmad,in her early 20s,feels, “The act of marrying at an early age is so wrong on so many levels. Girls should enjoy their lives and live it to the fullest, not worrying about marriage or being forced to serve their husbands at such a young age.”

“A child does not know what the real world demands, it is not all fairy tales. Marriage is a huge responsibility, being a wife is already a challenging task, let alone bearing a child at such a tender age. Even I as a young adult, don’t think I can shoulder such responsibilities, what more a child below the age of 18?

“Love is not at all the question. It takes hard work to actually know what love means. If it is about religion, if you really love someone, you would be willing to wait for them and be understanding towards its consequences,” she shares.

The Rise Of Underage Marriage In The Country

Throughout the years, there has been a rampant increase in the application for underage marriage according to a report by the Malaysian Syariah Judiciary Department (JKSM).In 2010, a United Nations report also showed that over 82,000 married women in Malaysia were girls between the ages of 15 and 19. For the same year, the Deputy Minister for Women revealed that nearly 16,000 girls below the age of 15 were in a marriage.

In 2012, there were about 1,165 applications for brides younger than the legal age of marriage. The following year, the nation was bitten by the shocking news of a 40 year-old man who purportedly took a 13 year-old girl in Sabah as his second wife with consent of both his first wife and her parents.

Since early 2014, JKSM revealed there were approximately 600 applications forunderage marriages pendingthe approval of the Syariah Court. And so far, approximately 446 out of those applications were approved. The numbers suggest that it is a common practice among Muslims especially, as well as indigenous communities; however the ‘trend’ is also prevalent amongst the Indian and Chinese communities.

When Does Religion And Law Come Into Play?

With these findings, one is bound to wonder does religion really play a role in determining the statistics of underage marriages? Are Muslims more confined to marrying at an early age to curb adultery?Lakshmi Sundaram, global coordinator for Girls Not Brides believes that child marriage is not officially endorsed by any religion.

“People often use religion and tradition to justify certain practices but it’s not really a religious obligation by any means in any religion in the world. It must also be noted that child marriages happen in all religions in the world. It is a problem across the world,” she was quoted saying in a report.

According to civil law, the legal age of marriage would be 18 years old. However, in Syariah law Muslim girls under the age of 16 must get consent from the Syariah Court, as the court will do a thorough assessment of a couple’s readiness to be married. Section 8 of the Islamic Family Law (Federal Territories) Act also states that the minimum legal age for Muslim boys to be married is 18, and 16 for Muslim girls.

In a recent case in Johor, a 15 year old boy dropped out of school after marrying a 17 year old girl following a two month courtship.We spoke to Selangor Mufti, Datuk Seri Mohd Tamyes Abdul Wahid to further understand why such arrangements were allowed and made permissible by the Syariah Court.Photo: news.abnxcess.com

“Islam does not prohibit underage marriage, as long as the couple are mature enough and understand the circumstances and responsibilities that come along with the act, as husband and wife. They need to be clear of the reason they are marrying each other.”

Even the Quran (4:6) equates, “And test the orphans [in your charge] until they reach a marriage-able age; then, if you find them to be mature of mind/sound in judgment, hand over to them their possessions…”

He continues to share, “Imagine getting married at the tender age of 15, how would one possess the knowledge required to be a responsible husband or wife? When for most, they are only fulfilling their duties as a student.”

Marriage is no child’s play. It requires a huge amount of responsibility, something children are definitely not ready for. Before deciding to get married at a young age, children must remember,“A marriage is a solemn pledge, and one needs to have the similarity of belief systems and common ground to establish a healthy relationship. Islam also makes no exception of this as one must be psychologically and physically fit in all aspects to get married,” he stressed out.

Too Little, Too Late

Underage marriage denies the rights of children to realise and achieve their true potential.In our conversation with 15-year-old ‘Anis’, she shares her experience of marrying a guy she barely knew, only for a few months, and described how her marriage ended in less than a year.

“He was my friend and I knew him for a few months. We were in love, and next thing I knew he asked for my hand in marriage.At first I thought he was joking, but then we talked it out with our parents and I realised then that he was serious,” she said.

She tells us how she felt that she was ready to be a wife to her husband who was 20 years of age. However, reality hit her hard when she realised that she was not ready to bear children and become a mother.

“While I was living with my in-laws, my mother-in-law asked me of when I would conceive a child? That’s when I realised that I couldn’t bear the thought of becoming a mother simply because I wasn’t ready to become one.”

After her divorce, ‘Anis’ now continues to lead her life as a student. She is currently waiting for her SPM results and speaks of how glad she is to once again lead a single life, without having the burden of carrying a second role as someone’s wife.

Is Prevention Really Better Than Cure?

While protecting dignity and preventing adultery are main concerns where child marriages are involved, a better question to raise would be − Are children able to provide proper childcare and offer the right qualities of parenthood?

Muhammad Fauzul Fahmi, a banker in his early 20s points that underage marriage may curb the society from promiscuous behaviour, “The world is exposed to many social problems these days. I believe a marriage would be the best solution to avoid unwanted social illnesses.”

“I feel that underage marriage is acceptable once both sexes have reached puberty.With the right level of maturity, they would be able to make sense of what’s right or wrong. Responsibility will naturally come with experience, and financial matters will surely be sought after once a marriage is properly consummated. All these problems are tiny hurdles, but it is better than carrying a child out of wedlock,” he claims.

Is It Worth The Risk?

Photo: jpnet.usm.myIf underage marriage is seen as a cure, then why does it come off as a threat, affecting the health of young girls, especially, in so many ways. After girls are pressed into marriage, they often become pregnant. Child birth among young girls could also lead to obstetric fistulas (a hole in the birth canal). Mothers who are younger than 20 years of age face a 50% higher risk of death when giving birth. Aside to this, other implications include higher prevalence of sexually transmitted diseases, HIV and cervical cancer.

As young girls are still in the process of physical development, they are just beginning to learn and understand about their bodies and its functions. Some, barely have knowledge about sex.Dr Noraida Endut, Associate Professor and Director of Women's Development Research Centre (KANITA), Universiti Sains Malaysia, further elaborates how younger girls are more vulnerable and are unaware of the implications of having sex at a young age.

“Powerless and without the skills to negotiate for safer sex, these young girls’ lives are jeopardised by their early marriage.

“Children are not exposed enough to sex education, and it’s definitely not right for them to have sex at such a young age. They probably do it based on instinct,” she expresses.

Research also shows that complications in pregnancy and childbirth are among the leading causes of death in girls aged 15 to 19 in low and middle income countries. Apart from physical health problems, underage marriage itself will make little impact on the lives of young girls.

The dangers and health risks of underage marriage surely needs to be thought through. Comprehensive public education and awareness should be imposed, in addition to law and judiciary enforcements in deterrence of this harmful practice. Clearly, there is a greater need to convince parents too that a better future exists for their children through education, and not through marriage.

--mD

22 Study Skills from the Quran

December 18, 2014

By Asharib Syed

**Editor's Note: Many of the ayahs referenced by number below are partial ayahs.

Imam Suyuti defines a verse as “Kullu ayatin wafqatun li tadabur”—“every verse is a moment of reflection, a pause for contemplation.”[1]

Qur'an is relevant today, just as it was almost 2 millennia ago. We need to learn to use it, and make it our friend throughout all stages of life, all circumstances and all experiences. Including in our student-life. Here are 22 lessons of guidance from the Qur'an for students till the end of time:

1.   Gratitude

The first bridge connecting humanity with the divine, through His own sacred words is gratitude and appreciation.

[All] praise is [due] to Allah , Lord of the worlds  (1:2)

The Qur'an begins with loving appreciation and gratitude to Allah in a verse that is both grammatically timeless and speaker-less. Reminding us that whether anyone thanks Him or not, all gratitude and appreciation belong to Him.

As students in the developed world, we're some of the most collectively ungrateful creatures walking under the sun. While others would give up an arm just to hold a textbook in the other, we're complaining about everything and anything. We need to remember that foremost, if Allah has given us the time, health, faculties of thought and opportunity to be in school—any school—it's our job to show a bit of appreciation and gratitude.  As Allah says,

And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed, 'If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]….(14:7)

The more grateful we are for our professors, our classmates, the cafeteria food, the boring mandatory courses—the more Allah will bless our journey in ways we can't imagine. Students in Gaza have missile holes where their blackboards are, STOP COMPLAINING — let's be grateful for our professors, our education, our degree, our marks and our experience.

Pro tip: Say “Alḥamdulilāh” whenever you're angry or upset at school related issues. Given how frustrating student life is, making “Alḥamdulilāh” a part of your daily vocabulary means a whole lot of blessings will be coming your way!

2.   Intention

Since time immemorial we've learned that the purpose of life is to worship:

And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me. (51:56)

Surprise of the century: This relates to everything in student life too. Every boring assignment, every 8:30 AM class with a less-than-articulate professor, every sleepless night—there's a reason for the madness. As students, our habits define our experiences. Take a moment to step back and dream big. Why are you here? This is one question that won't be asked in any multiple choice exam, but one that you should ask yourself often.

Islam encourages you to dream big. School tells you what the world can give you, Islam asks you what you can give to the world. Dream big and don't let anyone tell you otherwise, as your rewards are based on the audacity, ambition and depth of your dreams.

Maybe you want to save the world, end poverty, protect the world from financial crisis—or maybe you just want a halal job, to settle down, raise a family and provide for your parents. Both are respectable and worthwhile intentions to make our student experience worship. Yes, even your Google search becomes worship with the right intention.

Islam literally means submission, and part of this submission means to acknowledge that your entire existence is 'ibādah  — worship of Allah.

Say, “Indeed, my prayer, my rites of sacrifice, my living and my dying are for Allah , Lord of the worlds.” (6:162)

Pro Tip: Write down one simple goal (get a job, retire parents, raise a pious family), one medium-level goal (start a small business, build a masjid, lead local da'wah efforts), and one epic-level goal (start the next global corporation to empower world's developing nation, build hospitals across war-torn lands, establish the state of Palestine through peaceful diplomacy and partnership, build networks of orphanages, etc.)

3.   Seek Knowledge

Allah Al-'Aleem (All-Knowing) chose an unlettered man who grew up as an orphan, to receive the first revelation: “اقْرَأْ”, “Read!” (96:1). The first command by Allah to the last messenger of God, to the last era of humanity was “Read!” Talk about the start of a 'knowledge-based' era. This theme of “اقْرَأْ” was the foundation to the birth of our civilization, from the ascent of Islam to the rise of innovation in Islamic Andalus (Europe). Our rise and fall as a nation was correlated to our commitment to “اقْرَأْ.”

Just as when European aristocrats sent the best of their society to learn from Muslim academics in Andalus at a time when Europe was plunged in dark ages; when Muslim cities were geographies of learning and the pursuit of curiosity; the world sought knowledge through the vessel of Islamic scholarship, now, it's our responsibility to continue this tradition of learning and curiosity as a continuation of the theme of  “اقْرَأْ.”

Prophet Muhammed was commanded to say,

My Lord Increase me, and increase me in knowledge. (20:114)

Grammarians have noted that the actual du'a is a prayer not just for an increase in knowledge, but an increase in general. Suggesting that knowledge makes you a better human, a better father, a better husband, a better mother, a better individual in society.

Pro Tip: Paradigm shift—try to squeeze a lesson out of every lemon of a situation. Can't understand your prof's accent or teaching style in advanced chemistry? Well, you may not learn chemistry but at least you learned how to give effective presentations!

4.   Hard Work, Dedication, and Patience

We learn from Muhammad what it means to struggle and persevere for a mission. When you're on a mission you hustle, you exert yourself, you put all that you have into reaching the finish line. One of the earliest revelations:

Spend the night awake in prayer, except for a little bit of sleep. (73:2)

Allah is teaching the Prophet that when you have a purpose, you must be dedicated, sleeplessly striving for your vision. When you're driven with intention, Allah tells us we don't have time to sleep. You're living to make your dreams a reality, while others are sleeping to glimpse at dreams during the night.

We also learn dedication from the story of Nuh :

He said, “My Lord, indeed I invited my people [to truth] night and day.” (71:5)

When studying is worship, when you have a goal, when you have a mission—Islam teaches us through the stories of the Prophets that we must persevere and sleeplessly struggle for our dreams.

Pro Tip: Whatever your level of dedication, hustle to commitment: raise your bar higher. Ask, what can you do (or not do) to make yourself more successful? Maybe taking 45 minute showers isn't that productive? Or maybe you can survive on 5-6 hours of sleep?

5.   Sometimes it Doesn't Make Sense

You're studying, sometimes it's so confusing, you're just thinking why me? Why can't my teacher just get that I don't care? Why can't my parents just understand the trauma I'm going through studying something that's 'so useless'? Guess what? The world may not understand you, but Allah does. When Yusuf (a prophet, the son of a prophet, and the grandson of a prophet) was at the bottom of a well—rock bottom—imagine what he could have thought about? Why am I here? Why am I going through this? Why me? When he was at the bottom of the well, Allah said:

And thus, Allah established Yusuf on Earth. (12:21)

Allah is saying Yusuf could only become the king through first spending time at the bottom of a well. Likewise, the pain, trauma and the boredom – it may not make sense now, but it may be the source of unimaginable prosperity in the future.

Similarly: just as when the mother of Moses threw her son into a river, not knowing why or where he'll go and risking it all—Allah said:

So that you may grow and raise up under my eyes (20:39)

Allah had a plan for baby Musa , just as he has a plan for you and me. We must be patient for that plan to unfold, and trust in Allah when things don't make sense in the short term.

Pro Tip: Stay the course. Allah's got you covered, it may not make sense now, but know that Allah's got your back—just as he did for baby Musa , only to escape death and be raised as a prince in the palace of his killer, to liberate an entire nation; and just as he took Yusuf from the bottom of the well to becoming the Prince of Egypt.

So go to that mandatory social science class with your head high, having no idea why you're there—but having the certainty that it'll make sense sometime in the future.

6.   It's a Fitnah

School is 'fitnatizing' on so many levels. We've all thought about how school can be a “musibah” (a test, a calamity, a disastrous hardship). Linguistically, “musibah” means an arrow that has reached its mark—suggesting that what you are going through was meant to happen. It was designed for you. Allah designed your high school, college or university experience custom tailored for you.

We will test you, both through difficulty and ease. (21:35).

Rolling on Cloud 9 with smooth winds? Or barely lifting off the troughs from Mississauga Valley? Good times and hard times are a test.

Pro Tip:  Just as your university test is a test: your reaction, your patience and how you deal with that test—is a test in itself.

7.   Get Taqwa = Get Knowledge

If you are conscious of Allah, Allah will give you knowledge. He will teach you. (2:282)

He will help you, if you are conscious of Him. Stay away from things for His pleasure, and do things for Allah's sake—and Allah will teach you. Feeling the burden? Worried about impossible situations and difficulty? Taqwa - yourself up. As Allah says:

Whoever is conscious of Allah, Allah will make a way out for them. (65:2)

Pro Tip: All you need is Taqwa. The impossible can become the possible, and Allah can help you out in ways you could never have imagined.

8.   Repent, do Istikhfaar, say Astaghfirullāh

If school has any correlation to monetary gains, such as securing a job through good marks inshā'Allāh — then the Qur'an has an answer for that: “And oh my people, repent to your Lord and turn back to him, He'll send the skies pouring down in rain abundantly, and He'll increase you in strength adding to your strength, and don't turn away as criminals (11:52)”—elsewhere in the Qur'an (71:12), Allah links repentance, turning back to Allah, and seeking His forgiveness to increased wealth, children and prosperity.

Pro Tip: Whenever you're walking (which is a lot if you're actually on campus, and not skipping class) make it a habit to say Astaghfirullāh. Before your test, while studying, just keep saying Astaghfirullāh, “I repent to Allah.” Don't leave an empty second.

9.   Lower Your Gaze = Get Insight

The Qur'an (24:30) tells both men—and *ahem* yes, women too, to lower our gaze and avoid staring at the opposite gender beyond the first immediate glance. Ibn Qayim[2] reminds us that we can never have insight and depth without the proper use of our sight. Use your sight properly, and Allah will give you insight. (The sad irony is that campuses are some of the hardest places to lower our gaze, yet this is where we're supposed to be learning and growing intellectually to make the world a better place).

Pro Tip: Have your phone, book, or magazine in-hand while walking around campus or between classes. Even playing that horrific Flappy Birds game can be rewarding. Pretend to check the time on your watch, ridiculously often.

10.                     Keep Good Relations with Family and Fulfill Obligations

While studying, don't forget to be kind to your parents. Wash your dishes; don't become a hermit and leave your duties as a brother, sister, etc. Don't be a zombie! The Qur'an describes the hypocrites as those who:

They break what Allah has enjoined (2:27)

which includes family ties and duties.

Pro Tip: If you want barakah, blessings, in your studies, be nice to your parents and do the chores; nothing like acing that exam by making your mother smile.

11.                     Manage Your Time

On the Day of Judgement, our entire life will seem just like a few hours:

We only lived for a day, or part of a day. (23:113)

The Qur'an tells us that our life will fly by, just like this exam period will fly by. Our exam period, or semester is a metaphor to our life on earth—there's a beginning and there's an end. So just as there's “life after death” and that's what we're looking forward to—remember, there is “life after exams,” and that's what you're looking forward to.

Pro Tip: Have a plan, have a schedule, and use your time wisely.

12.                     Don't get Distracted — Turn Away

Allah describes believers as:

And they who turn away from anything that's not important, wasteful. (23:3)

Know what your weaknesses are, where your time gets lost, when and with whom. Allah also mentions a gentlemen's (or gentlewomen's) caveat, they:

Turn away honourably, with poise and elegant dignity. (25:72)

Pro Tip: You can't call-out your friends and family as a waste of time and space, you must leave gatherings and situations while maintaining elegance and kindness.

13.                     Repeat and Review

As students, we know we're weak. We know we're forgetful, we probably still don't know our course code for the elective we've been taking for the past 4 months. Allah knows we're weak in fact he says:

And mankind was created weak (4:28)

Pro Tip: We are a creation that is weak and forgetful (In fact the word Insaan meaning “mankind,” is a hyperbolized form of 'someone that forgets' a lot)—therefore, it's our job to review, repeat and re-read constantly.

Only Allah is perfect and doesn't forget,

And your lord does not forget. (19:64)

14.                     Keep Good Relations with Your Teachers

They're the source of knowledge, and regardless of how good or ineffective they may be—Allah tells us to be kind, gentle and appreciative of them. The story of Musa and Khidr in Surah Kahf is nothing but the story of a student and a teacher.

Musa asks his teacher Khidr, “Can I follow you to learn from what you've been taught?” (18:66)

Pro Tip: We learn humility, patience, and respect from the Qur'an for our teachers. Of course, this comes in particularly beneficial when negotiating marks and receiving recommendations.

15.                     Get Help, Study Together

Allah tells us in the Qur'an to get extra help from our teachers, TAs, RAs, or anyone else:

And ask the people who remember, if you do not know yourself (16:43)

Pro Tip: To really test the depth of your knowledge, ask deeper questions. 'Rattle the cages' of assumptions, test the limits of theories and contemplate on alternative approaches.

16.                     Help Others

Now if you don't need to ask others for help, know that you should help out others. A fundamental goal of Islam and Muslims is service. Help others and make the world a better place.

And Allah will help those who help Him. Indeed, Allah is Powerful and Exalted in Might. (22:40)

Pro Tip: If you're intention is to help others for the sake of Allah, as part of being a good Muslim and for the sake of Islam—then Allah will help you out. (Now don't be helping a sister at 10pm alone on campus, just to show how righteous Muslims really are!)

17.                     Eliminate Your Ego and Arrogance

Allah teaches us intellectual humility:

Above every knowledgeable person, is someone with more knowledge. (12:76)

Your mind, your memory, your marks, your GPA, your whatever—it's all from Allah. Just as you didn't choose to be born with a nose on your face and not on your toes, you didn't select your inborn talents.

Is not hell the [proper] abode for all who [thus] deny the truth (29:68)

Pro Tip: Know your place and don't get arrogant with what you know.

18.                     Complain to Allah

When he lost two of his beloved sons, Yaqub said,

He said I only complain, cry, beg and plea to Allah about my circumstance (12:86)

Let this exam period be a chance for you to cry before Allah, talk to him and complain to him about your worries and fears—don't complain in front of others. Sometimes Allah sends things in your life, only so you can turn back towards Allah. He misses your voice and wants you to call Him in times of difficulty and happiness.

Pro Tip: Complain to Allah, not to others.

19.                     Trust in Allah

Yunus was swallowed up by a whale. In the darkness of the night, in the depths of the ocean, deep in the belly of a whale—there was no foreseeable exit. With an imminent yet excruciatingly painful death ahead, Yunus at that moment reminded himself of his weakness. His incapacity and powerlessness to redefine the situation. He realized his helplessness to Allah and at that moment, cried out:

There is no God but Allah, how perfect is He, I'm definitely among the wrongdoers. (21:87)

Immediately thereafter, Allah responded and saved his troubled slave from an impossible situation.

Allah teaches us that just as he helped Yunus out of an impossibly difficult circumstance, likewise He can make a way out for us.

Allah tells Musa :

Allah said: Don't fear, you are victorious. (20:68)

Just as Allah told Musa to let go of his human emotion of fear, and trust in Allah when facing a tyrant and his magicians; likewise, remember that Allah is telling us to leave our fears aside, accept our helplessness and surrender our frailty to the limitlessness of Allah.

Pro Tip: Study hard and then trust in Allah to help you through it.

20.                     Put Things in Perspective

And the life of the world is nothing but a temporary deception. (3:185)

Allah puts our exams into perspective: it's nothing but a temporary deception. In the long run, it probably won't matter as much as it does right now. So take it with a grain of salt and trust Allah, it'll be okay. Inshā'Allāh. Be patient. Breathe.

And what is to come later, is better than what came before.” (93:4)

This verse can be translated to reflect several layers of meaning. I articulated it relevant to this context as the verse is capacious to such an application.

Pro Tip: Maintain your perspective. Realize your exams aren't the end of the world.

21.                     Accept Qadar

Allah extends rizq (rizq could include provisions like wealth, jobs, and by extension even marks) to whoever he wants; and He gives in perfect, calculated measure (limiting it to others that He chooses). (13:26)

Sometimes if it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be. Islam is beautiful and perfect, the education system is not. Allah is so merciful He knows the outcomes are beyond our control, that's why you're only judged based on your efforts and your intentions.

Pro Tip: Don't be harsh on yourself. Do your best and leave the rest to Allah. And always say Alḥamdulilāh.

22.                     Make Du'ā'

We're all just travelers on a long and painful journey as students, who can help us except for Allah?

So who else besides Allah, can help the one in difficulty, and alleviate from him the pain, suffering and harm? (27:62)

Du'ā' is an experience when a slave recognizes his helplessness, his inability, his powerless and his desperate need for the one who is limitless, Allah.

I end off with the du'ā' of Zakariya , a du'ā' of impossibility and faith, of patience and trust, of hope and positive expectations,

 

And I will never, in prayer to you my Beloved Lord, lose hope.” (19:4)

Pro-Tip: A measure of your relationship to Allah is your du'ā'. A lover never gets tired of conversing with their beloved, so ask yourself how often and for how long do you make du'ā'? Set aside quality time daily for du'a.

A concluding lesson about Qur'an: It's relevant. It's our guide. It's our buddy, our friend that never leaves us. It's there for us, but the question is are we there by it?

I encourage everyone to not lose hope. Trust in Allah, and be patient. As Allah says, “Fathkuroonee, athkurkum, washkuroo lee walaa takfuroon”—“remember me, Allah, and I'll remember you. Be grateful to me and don't disbelieve, don't be ungrateful.”

If you benefitted even a bit, don't forget this little brother of yours in your du'a. Jazakallah Khayr.

[1] Al Itqqaaan Fil Uloomil Qur'an, imam Suyuti

[2] Lowering the Gaze, 'al-Muntaqâ min Ighâthatul Lufhân fî Masâyid ash-Shaytân' [pp.'s 102-105], of Ibn al-Qayyim, summarised by 'Alî Hasan al-Halabi (find the pdf online, it's in English and its awesome motivation to lower our gaze).

http://muslimmatters.org/2014/12/18/22-study-skills-quran/